The Aguirre Family

Tonight my heart is heavy as a new friend lost her 15 year old son to cancer yesterday.  I met Nina on Halloween at the Ronald McDonald House as she sat crying on a bench.  She was heart broken that her son Christian was yet again in the hospital and missing out on the night.  Christian had been cancer free for almost exactly a year and 10 days earlier he had relapsed.  She cried telling Wendy and I that "this was supposed to be his year".  That he had missed out on Halloween last year...and this was going to be his year.  And while she was grateful for a place for her other 3 boys to come and celebrate she was devastated that a part of her was left alone across the street.

Christian's story tugged on my heart and I returned with Joe and my family the following Friday to meet Christian after Stephen's cardiology appointment to give him a gift basket.  Nina had mentioned how defeated he felt and I wanted to do something small to brighten his day.  With the help of an anonymous donor I was able to make him an extra special basket in hopes of lifting his spirits...even for just a day.  November 6th I met Christian for the first and only time.  We talked and joked about him liking the Dallas Cowboys.  He was weak and soft spoken but he smiled as I told him how painful it was to buy him Cowboy slippers and not Charger ones =)  Since we were at the Ronald McDonald House I even found an old magazine with Stephen and Philip Rivers for him to take home and read.  We spent about an hour with him, his mom and his brothers and before they left we placed hand on him while Joe prayed.

5 days later she texted me asking for prayers as he was admitted into the ICU and today I received the worst text of them all.  "My boy took his last breath yesterday at 2am".  It has only been 2 weeks since we met...I can hardly believe it.

I can only imagine the pain and loss they feel right now.  She invited us to a candle vigil at their house tonight and I packed up the family and drive down to La Mesa.  I squeezed her long and tight as we cried together.

In some ways this all feels like a whirlwind.  I just met this family yet they asked me to grieve with them.  Yet God works in mysterious ways.  It was a volunteer at the carnival that noticed her crying alone and asked me to greet her.  It was a tug on my heart that said go back.  And in our brief relationship God has used Stephen's life to bring her joy.

Tonight, unexpectedly, she smiled getting to introduce Stephen to her family.  She proudly told them what a miracle child he was like her Christian.  She told us how often Christian looked at the magazine and talked about Stephen.  I could hardly believe it.  Stephen and his story made an impact on this family.  An impact I didn't see coming.  And all I could think was "how beautiful".  How beautiful it is that God puts certain people in our lives when we need it the most.  He uses us in ways we wouldn't expect and often in ways we never know.  There are so many people who made a lasting impact on me during my stay at the Ronald McDonald House and they don't even know it.  I will always remember the woman who saw me crying and came up immediately and hugged me.  She assured me that everything would be fine and prayed for me.  I don't know her name but I will always remember her hug.    

And all I can think right now is how beautiful.  How beautiful it is that I met Nina 3 weeks ago.  How beautiful it is that my kids got to meet and pray for Christian.  

I hate when my kids have to experience death.  I remember weeping when I had to tell them that a precious little girl who who they were praying for had passed away.  My first instinct was to avoid it. I allowed them to continue to pray for her because I didn't have the heart to tell them the truth.  I wanted to protect them from the pain and fear of death.  But one night Michael asked how she was doing and I broke down having to tell them.  It was so hard but so good.  And tonight was another one of those nights.  We had to explain to them what was going on and what to expect.  They asked a lot of good questions while we were there.  Why were people crying?  Why did he have cancer?  What kind of cancer did he have?  Can you catch cancer?  And I got to answer each and everyone and explain to them that we were here to support and love his family.  How beautiful is that.

Each of my kids got to give Nina a big hug...and Stephen gave her many!   The pain is real but there is beauty in it.  It feels strange to say but it brought me joy seeing her take him in her arms and smile.  That my baby, my little hero, was bringing her comfort without even knowing it.  It's beautiful.

So please pray for the Aguirre family.  The road ahead of them will be long and painful.  And while I don't know where their hearts are at I pray that God would do amazing things.  That they would put their hope and trust in Him and that they would feel His peace and presence through this pain.  And praise God for crossing our paths... It just feels like it was meant to be.